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Archive for April 2011

Words With Friends

You can read the book of James or many other scripture passages to learn more about the power of your words. I could break down how many words the average person speaks per day. We could chat for a moment about how what you talk about is an overflow of what’s going on in your heart, but I’d like to take a couple paragraphs to talk about your words with your friends.

Every friend you have, without a doubt, has an area in their life that they are majorly DISCOURAGED in. I remember when I used to do a lot of things in the spotlight and whenever people would encourage me, they’d start their exhortation with, “I know you hear this all the time, but…”. Often times, because we think someone hears “it” a lot, we don’t need to have some words with our friend. If everyone carried that mindset, nobody would ever get encouraged.

People aren’t looking for generic encouragement. They’re not looking for a pat on the back. What truly moves a person is when you hear some words from God to share some words with them. Ask God two questions: Who do you want me to encourage? And what do you want me to say?

Two things will happen when you do that. First, you’ll go deeper with the Lord because you won’t be using archived generic words for friends, but you’ll actually have to fall to your knees and hear from God! Secondly, your friend will go deeper with the Lord because they’ll be hearing the exact words God’s been desperately trying to get to them. Even if it’s not this deep, pause in the middle of the day, and think of someone who could use a dose of some words with a friend.

Go Figure

Should I get a new car with better gas mileage? Should I be in this relationship? Should I continue going to this church? Should I finish school here? What about working on my masters? What about paying for it? Should I be investing or saving? Should I get a new job? Should we have a kid? Should we move? Decisions. Decisions.

It’s extremely rare that I sit across the table from a young adult and one of the above questions not come up. It’s rare that I look in the mirror and one of the above questions not come up. And here’s the usual conclusion from the conversations generated from the above questions: “I just gotta FIGURE it out.” It’s like we’re all trying to figure out the next scene in our movie called Life.

I’ve noticed, talking to people in their 40′s and 50′s, that the questions never cease. This quest to figure out everything will never stop. I’ve not found the cure for the questions that plague our hearts and minds, but I have a paradigm shift that will allow us to filter the countless thoughts.

SET GOALS. Take out a piece of paper or a journal and create 4 boxes and answer the important questions.

Box #1.] Spiritual Goals – Who does God want me to be over the next two years? What’s my point A and my point B? What’s the secret sin I’ve been dealing with for years that I could address over the next two years?

Box #2.] Relationship Goals – When I take inventory of the things my friends struggle with, what can I do to help them? What habit can I create over the next 2 years to be more intnetional about my relationships with my family, and with my friends?

Box #3.] Physical – Regardless of my weight, EVERYBODY should work out, so what’s my plan over the next two years to be in the best possible shape conducive for my lifestyle? How healthy am I eating? How can I slowly change my diet over the next two years to create balance in my health?

Box #4.] Financial – What kind of financial position do I want to be in two years from now? How much do we want to say we gave away two years from now? If I eat out one less time a week from the norm for a year and transferred that money to a savings account, who could I bless with that $500 or more? What can I do to discipline myself in the area of how I spend my money beyond the basic budget?

Use these as your filter. So if you’re making a relationship or career decision, ask yourself, does this person or job help me get closer to who God wants me to be over the next two years? Once you think you’ve figured something out, the game changes anyway. But don’t ever lose track of who God wants you to be. That’s something transcends seasonal wishes and desires for your own life.

What are some of the goals you’re setting for yourself? Is there another box you’d add?

Nap Time

Have you ever been going through something that could be anywhere from mild to catastrophic, and regardless of the measure of pain you find yourself in, you have this feeling that you’re God is… Sleeping? It’s not like you feel like he’s actually inflicting pain on you or causing the storm to shake you, but if we remove the cape for a second, we’d be honest in saying that sometimes our God seems to just do… nothing. Have you ever prayed for hours for something, or maybe even fasted for a few days attempting to hear from God and you hear… nothing?

Matthew 8.24 says, “Without warning, a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping.” Jesus. Sleeping?! During a storm? I love that the scriptures tell us that the storm came without warning because I often find myself going through UNEXPECTED situations. 

Here’s 3 things you should do when you find yourself in an unexpected storm and you feel like you’re God is sleeping.

1.) Don’t jump ship.
Stay in the boat. People are always tempted to quit when facing a storm. You may feel like the ship is sinking, but whatever you do, don’t get out of the boat.

2.) Feed your faith.
Surround yourself with at least one positive person who knows and reads the Bible often. During storms, we want to have pity parties where people join in on our pain. In Matthew 8, Jesus rebuked them for their lack of faith in the midst of the storm. Faith comes from hearing the word. Don’t call the friend who you know will feed your pessimism.

3.) Take a nap
Take a lesson from Jesus! Look at what he was doing! We often read this passage and think it was the disciples’ storm. It was Jesus’ storm too! Can you imagine if, in the middle of the storm, Peter yells out, “Guys! Just go to sleep!” That’d be nuts, but don’t stress out over stuff you won’t care about in a year anyway.

4.) Be honest about your storm.
“How are you? I’m good. How are you? Good.” Welcome to the classic church conversation where we practice letting people know how ok we really are not. You can get in the habit of always being “good” so much that when you’re in a storm, it’s difficult to be honest with people about where you’re at. You may not realize it, but keeping the cape on all the time with people bleeds over into your time with God too. The disciples let Jesus know where they were really at. Maybe you don’t have confidence to take a nap in a storm, but don’t act like you’re not in the storm at all. Jesus is really good with people who are honest about where they’re at.

I don’t think our God is sleeping. I think we’re looking up for answers to calm the storm, but perhaps, he’s right next to you waiting for you to realize it’s not just your storm that He watches. You both are in this thing together regardless of how you’re handling it. No capes allowed.